This season of my life has definitely been a season of confusion. The older I get, the more choices I have to make. And if you really know me......then you know that I strongly dislike making decisions. I just don't like it. The main reason why I don't like it is because I want to do what God wants me to do and I'm afraid that I'll make the wrong choice. I want Him to be glorified in the choices I make. I want to do what He wants me to do.
Lately it feels like I'm walking on a road and up ahead are different paths that I can go down. As I keep walking I stare at these paths in confusion. I constantly pray, "Lord, where do You want me to go?" No answer. Uncertain and kind of afraid I just keep praying, "Lord, what do You want me to do?" Again, no answer. Stressed and feeling anxiety I start remembering that God is in control. I remember that He isn't going to take me somewhere that He doesn't want me to go.
I realize how worried I've been about the future. I've been so uncertain about what God has planned for me and I haven't been patient in waiting for His answers. Although, I'm amazed that God ALWAYS answers prayer. Always. But that doesn't mean His answer will always be yes. Sometimes it's a no.
In my house there's a picture hanging on the wall in the dining room that says, "God's answers are wiser than our prayers." This is so true! He knows the plans He has for me (Jeremiah 29:11). And He works all things together for good to those who love Him (Romans 8:28-29). He is so much wiser than I could ever be. So if He closes a door or says no to something then I have to trust that it's for a good reason.
Just this last week God has been very gracious to me and has totally been opening and closing doors. The more I keep walking through life and approach these paths the more peace I have. I'm still confused about some of these decisions... But I know that when the time comes, He will show me which path to go down. He has always been faithful and always will be. His love never fails. So, even when things get confusing.. I trust in my Lord and Savior. And even though I makes mistakes and make wrong choices at times.. I know that Jesus has paid for them all on the cross. Again, His love never fails. <3
